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Are we there yet?

I’ve seen lots of movies about Jesus, and I can’t recall which one it was (sorry), but there was one that opened with a bunch of men playing an ancient form of soccer. In look and dress, they appeared as men from Jesus’ era and were kicking around what looked to be a bunch of rags tied together.

At one stage they get quite vigorous, and there’s a ‘stacks on’ moment as they fall on top of each other laughing. As the men stand up and start using names, it turns out that at the bottom of the stack is Jesus! It becomes apparent that on their wanderings from town to town, they’ve taken a rest break and played a game to amuse themselves.

The scene shook me a little at first – it’s not biblical! – but then I thought: hang on, you’ve got a bunch of blokes travelling together, most in their 20s and 30s; every now and then they’re going to want to run off some energy and get competitive at the same time, and the scene made great sense to me.

It also highlighted Jesus’ fully human nature – he liked playing footy with the boys!

There are lots of moments in the Gospels when we read of Jesus and the disciples travelling together, and I wonder what they would have said.

Jesus – Right, lads. Fifteen miles to go; let’s keep moving.

Peter – Let’s run it and see who gets there first!

Jesus – No, Peter. Just walk.

Thomas – Why do we have to walk? Why don’t we have donkeys?

Jesus – Walking is good, Thomas, it gives us time to think.

Peter – I don’t want to think, I want to run!

Andrew – How about you run, brother? We’ll walk.

Peter – Yes! I’ll run. You walk. See ya suckers. [Peter runs off, at full speed.]

Thomas – Are we there yet?

Jesus – No, Thomas.

Matthew – Isn’t this a toll road? I hate paying tolls. Why don’t we take the longer road and avoid the toll?

Judas – We’ll just pay the toll. I’m sure there’s enough coins in the bag.

Jesus – Are you sure there’s enough in there, Judas?

Judas – Yes, I’m sure. Hey, have I ever let you down before?

Thomas – Are we there yet?

Jesus – No, Thomas.

John – You old guys walk slow.

Jesus – John, relax. You’ll be old one day.

John – I can’t even imagine a time I’ll be that old. Can’t even picture it.

Jesus – The day will come. What’s that dust cloud on the road ahead?

[After a moment it becomes apparent what the dust cloud is as Peter returns to them all sweaty and puffing.]

Peter – Right. Been there. Back. Now what?

Judas – Do it again.

Peter – Yes, I will! [Peter runs away again, still at full speed.]

Thomas – Are we there yet?

Jesus – No, Thomas. But we’ll be there soon.

Thomas – Of course we will; never doubted it for a minute.

– Major Mal Davies and his wife Major Tracey are the Corps Officers at Adelaide City Salvos

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