No! I beg you! Not that!

Way back in 1978, the Bible hit ‘top ten’ singles charts in 17 different countries with a song that sold more than 20 million singles. The song was ‘Rivers of Babylon’ and the group was Boney M., who were based in Germany.

The lyrics were based on verses in Psalm 19 and Psalm 137. However, they – wisely! – didn’t include the first part of Psalm 137:6, perhaps one of the oddest verses in the Bible.

In the NIV it says: “May my tongue cling to the roof of my mouth if I do not remember you ...’. The writer – exiled in Babylon – is speaking of Jerusalem and committing to never forgetting their home.

The NLT says, “May my tongue stick to the roof of my mouth if I fail to remember you.” The KJV says, “If I do not remember thee, let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth.” Several versions refer to the tongue sticking to the ‘palate’.

It’s an interesting personal threat made by the writer – “If I forget you, well, um, gosh, darn, I don’t know, um, may ... may ... um ... I know: may my tongue stick to the roof of my mouth!”

I wonder what other personal punishments the writer considered first for forgetting Jerusalem.

“May my little toes fall off.”

“May my elbows be stapled together.”

“May my nostrils be filled with sand.”

“May my knees bend backwards.”

“May my belly button fill with ants.”

“May my thumbs be permanently stuck in my ears.”

I guess we should feel fortunate that the writer was prepared to self-inflict these punishments rather than using them as a threat to others: that wouldn’t be nice.

“Don’t you forget Jerusalem! If you do, well ... if you do, may your eyeballs always be itchy!”

I’m also glad God doesn’t work this way; he just waits for us patiently and offers acceptance. It would be very different if God said to us: “Don’t you forget about me, or I’ll stick your legs together and make you waddle everywhere like a penguin!”

However, God doesn’t do that – he loves us. And don’t you dare forget that, or may your nose be turned upside down before it rains heavily for a week!

Major Mal Davies is the Assistant Divisional Commander for the Victoria Division